Kaizoku no Blin/2
"Clean Water May Be Someone Else's Diamonds" is the 2nd episode of the Kaizoku no Blin series. Intro music: Lucie, Too - Lucky ---- Tripoli Island. A country that used to have millions of people at its bases, is now a country in ruins. Hundreds of people lie dead on the street. Thousands more crawl having injuries. Scores of medics scatter around the city because of a Marine action that has entered the city. Man: Please he-elp me. The man died without saying his intentions. Not even his name. However, the crew was sure who the culprit was. Johanne: Now I can honestly say... that man knocked up. Jonathan: Now's not the time for dark humor, baby girl. And did you just say a man got "knocked up"?! (For ESL/TOEFL speakers, "knocked up" means "to get pregnant". Johanne might have actually said "knocked out".) Johanne: Sorry! I thought I can lighten up the mood by a little... Jonathan: Let's move along. They encounter a tall person sitting calmly in the midst of the rubble. He was known as the Tripoli Island's "Big Man" for his abnormally large size. Johanne: Hey! What happened here? Moufassa: Some Marines attacked our little land. Wait, who're you? Johanne: I'm Johanne. I'm a pirate from Redrum Island. Wanna join me? Moufassa: You ain't serious, right? Anyway, I'm Moufassa. I'm the butcher here. And what's a pirate? WA-AH-WOAAAHHH! SHIT! Moufassa slipped and sled through the rubble. Moufassa: Enough of those clumsy tropes. God damn it. ---- Moufassa: Let's go have some tea in my house. It's time for another batch of one, then I'll explain everything. It's on the other side of the island so there's no war or bloodshed over there. Johanne: At this time where cannonballs and artillery shells are flying left and right?! Jonathan: I agree. Johanne: NAAAANIIIII?!!!! Jonathan: Think of that as training. Right, Hansuke? Hansuke: Yeah. You told me earlier I can be like Goldd, right? I think this IS training. And Johanne, I know you're the risk taker and extrovert of the group. Don't tell me you're only good at talking and socializing and all that shit. Johanne: Fine, but screw you all. The group tries to fend down artillery fire. Luckily they managed to throw them all to the sky just before it hits more structures. They arrived to the real Tripoli Town, on the other side of the island. They have not been affected by artillery fire, but their hospitals are cramping due to the incoming patients getting treatment. They arrived at a house near the Old Town market. ---- Johanne: Hmm. Seems pretty decent of a place. Jonathan '''(whispers): Shush, bree. This ain't Yelp or some shit. '''Moufassa: This isn't really my house. We're just taking my car somewhere. Let's go, Turtle Car! Jonathan: SUGOOOOIIII!!! Turtle Cars. Their only appearance in One Piece was not canon, meaning they only show up in the anime. Their design is similar to those of the common racing cars of the era, the hot rod. The crew rode the car to their next destination: Moufassa's house. Johanne: Now THAT's a house. Jonathan: Yeah. That's a house, bree. Hansuke: Okay bre- Johanne (hard slaps Hansuke): ONLY JONATHAN'S ALLOWED TO CALL ME BREE! Hansuke: Ouch! What the hell's that for? Johanne '''(hard slaps again): '''DON'T YOU HEAR WHAT I JUST SAID?! Johanne was hit by a cannonball. Hansuke: Thank you, whomever fired that fucking cannonball! ---- Jonathan: JOHANNE! A silhouette stands out of the smoke. Jonathan: Johanne? Is that you? Meanwhile, Hansuke has no comment. Johanne: I'm fi- Everyone looks at her. Johanne: KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! WHY THE HELL AM I NAKED?! STOP STARING AT ME, YOU PERVERTS! Jonathan: What are you talking about? Johanne '''(punches Jonathan): YOU TOO! '''Jonathan: You don't need to do that, Johanne! Johanne: It's okay when only you, but look! Everyone's looking at me. ---- Moufassa: Are you okay, now get in... to my humble abode. And br-I mean, Johanne here needs to take a chill pill. Johanne (after dressing herself up): How's that a house? It's a fort! A FREAKING FORT! Hansuke: He's a man of status here. Johanne: How did you know about that? Hansuke: Well, no shit. Moufassa: So, you must be interested in my house, then? Johanne: Nah, but definitely Jonatha- Jonathan, get back to Earth, please. Jonathan: (sobs) THIS IS JUST SO COOL!... (sobs) THIS MEDIEVAL ARMOR IS REALLY AWESOME! (sobs) Johanne (in a singing tone, and in English): I never thought that you'll be like that? Jonathan: Tell me honestly... ---- Hansuke '(seemingly cannot sing on the right note): ''Oi, we'll get our show cancelled. It's because of some Ozzy hipsters... for copyright infringement. '''Johanne: You're aware of fair use right? And we're the ones performing it so why bother? We obviously put the disclaimer below. Hansuke: You might try performing original songs sometimes? Johanne: Well because we're thinking of that. Do you know how hard to this is... to make songs like that? I never thought that you'll be like that? Moufassa (speaking Japanese): Why is this becoming a musical episode all of a sudden? And is that copyrighted music overlaying this? Jonathan '''(on a Den Den Mushi): We should make an original musical series out of this. '''Musical staff: Okay, here's from our spare audio room. Jonathan '(on a new singing tone, and in Japanese): ''Can we sing on this tone now. Alright, guys? Or better stop if we have to. '''Johanne: Oh my god. Hansuke: It's as if the King has spoken. Holy shit! I think we really need to stop and act our age. ---- It seems that Moufassa is an innocent man, except his house is actually the scene of the crime. Moufassa: Now I'll tell you about the reasons why this country is being invaded by those Marines. Jonathan: I'm pretty sure something has to do with this house. Moufassa: Yeah. This house is actually a little castle. I've been elected as this country's defense minister because of my record with pirates. The World Government has a great interest in something that was hidden inside this exact room. Johanne: Is it a sword, a certain amount of treasure or something like that? Moufassa: It's what they call a devil fruit. They say this is a stuff of legends, but this specific one is part of a certain kingdom's regalia. Johanne: Do devil fruits taste good? Moufassa: They call it "devil fruits" because it is said to taste like hell! YOHOHOHOHO Everyone is silent after his failed joke. Moufassa: So you don't like puns. Everybody else (shouting): FUCK NO! Moufassa (complaining): Okay, fine. I won't do that again. At least in this foreseeable future. Damn! Moufassa: But I'm serious about that devil fruit tasting terrible though. A friend of mine ate a devil fruit and he said it tastes like shit. It also gave him useless powers and cannot swim into the ocean after that. Johanne: I think I'll be fine. I never tried to swim anytime in my life. How about you, Jonathan? Jonathan: Same, but I'm pretty sure showering will be a pain in the ass. How about you, Hansuke? ---- Hansuke: Oh hell no! Our group needs someone who can swim! And what's up with the speech patterns? Jonathan '''(looking at Moufassa): He has a point. '''Moufassa: Well then... do you like stories? Jonathan: Sure. But haven't you told the story about this "devil fruit" already? Moufassa: I'm not done yet. Johanne: Fine. Go ahead. Moufassa: They call whomever had that devil fruit the "Luminous King" and he was worshipped all over that country. It was up until that Marine killed that king in order to obtain that devil fruit and claimed it as their own. Jonathan: Who's it then? Moufassa: Borsalino. He was one of the admirals of the Marines that fought the late Pirate King several times. Up until that fateful day, where the Pirate King achieved that status. Well, you know who's the late Pirate King was right? Jonathan and Johanne: Monkey D. Luffy. Moufassa: So you were thought history correctly. The World Government of that time was trying to pull tricks to make pirates as bad as possible so people will be conditioned that they are stuck with whatever the Government has to say. Unluckily, the Marines are the Government's dogs. ---- Moufassa: Let's take you back almost 500 years ago. Borsalino wasn't a Devil Fruit user that time and was still pretty young. Despite being sluggish and laidback, Borsalino was a man of great will. Returning back to the last years of the 1400s, a child Borsalino entered the Marines. He trained under people like Tsuru and Sengoku. After 16 years of training, an adult Borsalino emerged from the ranks and became a Marine commodore. Tsuru: You've been doing good for such a lazy man, Borsa-kun. Who knows? One day you might even surpass me and I'm sure the Government. That's why, Mary Geoise is looking for you. Borsalino: Ooh, they should be scared of me overtaking everyone else. And you still look beautiful despite your age-ne. Tsuru '''(striking him with a staff): Have some manners or I'll hang you across the sea again! I'd hand you over to Sengoku. '''Borsalino: Him again? That piece of dog shit-ne! I never had the opportunity to have other senior officers take me somewhere... Tsuru: Learn to know your place, Borsa-kun. He's still an admiral and a senior, you fucking lazy idiot! After being accompanied by Sengoku to Mary Geoise, Borsalino meets Kong. Kong was the Marine's Fleet Admiral that time. He serves as the defender of the Gorosei. Kong: You must be Borsalino, right? Borsalino: Haaaaiiiii.... (Yeeeeessss...) Kong: So the rumors were true. You're really lazy as shit. Borsalino: I ain't "lazy". You just seem to be too fast. Kong: Learn your manners, boy! I am the Fleet Admiral of the Marines and you, I don't even know who you are. ---- Kong: I do like your personality's willpower though. Something that deserves an Admiral position. Well, I'll invite you to the World Military Draft. You'll get an immediate promotion into a Vice Admiral, but of course you have to do something for me. Borsalino: What's the task, sir-ne? The Gorosei arrive one by one. The first one tells Borsalino on what to do. The others remain silent. Gorosei: There's this one kingdom ruled by a powerful supporting a major rebel faction in this government. All you have to do is bring this fruit into the scene and take his powers. Take that, and you're going the easy way into the ladders. Understand. Borsalino: Yes, sirs-ne. Borsalino goes alone and boards a ship along with hundreds of his subordinates into the South Blue nation of Amaterasu. This country is led by King Oda IV. A rich seafaring country, it is known for producing some of the best shipwrights and explorers in the world. ---- Meanwhile, Minister Stanc informs the King about Borsalino's arrival. Stanc: I've had a very bad feeling about this, sir. It seems that the Government had discovered our secret. They've brought Marine Commodore Borsalino which is their rookie at this point. What should we do? Oda IV: Don't get worried too much. I'll deal with this. Stanc: How about a proposal of I'LL deal with this, sir? Oda IV: Stanc, I know you're brave enough to handle this. But let me handle a nice gentleman's fight once. The Marines have enclosed the island. It seems that every Marine outpost in South Blue is helping Borsalino's entry into the country. It is not known to Borsalino's party that Rear Admiral Sakazuki will also be arriving at the scene. He will later be known as one of the three Admirals of the Marines and after over a year, their Fleet Admiral. Sakazuki however was given a different purpose. He was assigned there to destroy a library flotilla that is obstructing the World Government's tribute ship. Sakazuki: Okay, boys! Saddle up! I want to get this shit done! Lock up everything that doesn't have anything to do with this job. Subordinates: RYOKAI! (ROGER!) (bebop background music) ---- Borsalino noticed that an action is already happening at Amaterasu's port. Borsalino: Ahh, It's sure is a party going down there. Why am I not in here, though? Get 'em, boys! Oh, and wear the uniforms I told you-ne. Subordinates: RYOKAI! Everyone in Borsalino's division rushed to their stations and wore long-sleeved uniforms with the inverted Marine color scheme. That was decided out of a whim rather than him knowing Sakazuki is also in the island. Borsalino also changed his outfit into a suit and went out of his ship. Borsalino '''(monologuing): Let's do this shit-ne. '''Island Soldier: Drop your weapon. Now! Borsalino: What are you talking about? Are you crazy? Borsalino charged at every defender of the island and managed to get out without any major damage. Afterwards, he went into the palace. Borsalino: That scratch feels so itchy-ne. This must be the palace then. Stanc arrives in a zeppelin, along with a bunch of other defenders. Stanc: Surrender now, or we'll use extreme force. We know who you are, Borsalino. You're here to take our treasure and run away with it. Borsalino throws a huge column in the direction of the zeppelin like a javelin and manages to hit it. Stanc and everyone else fall from the sky. Borsalino: Say your prayers now-ne. Stanc: Fuck you! Borsalino: Jzheaaahhhh... Borsalino hit Stanc's head with a boulder, crushing it. Borsalino: Usuneeeehhh.... ---- Borsalino enters the royal hall. Oda: What the hell you want, you Government piece of shit? Borsalino: What do you think-''ne''? Oda: Oh, I see. "You're a man of culture as well." Borsalino attacks Oda and battled for hours. However, he lethally injured Oda by striking him with a Haki-imbued sword which affects Logia users. Borsalino: Guess who's the better swordsman now? Oda: What the fuck? Is this Haki? Borsalino strikes Oda again with the sword again, killing Oda in the process Borsalino: Haaiii... An orange fruit (both the name and the color of it) gained swirls of the fruit and shined yellow. This is what they call the Pika Pika no Mi, the centerpiece of the legendary regalia of Amaterasu. Ending music: Sana - Usuragu Kioku < Previous | Next > Site navigation Category:Chapters Category:Kaizoku no Blin